The new boyfriend of my daughter’s father

Der neue Freund von dem Vater meiner Tochter

Suddenly he is there, the new boyfriend of my daughter’s father. I had thought that would never happen anyway, the gentleman in my household, for all his dating, was ultimately incapable of relationship, no one would ever get involved with someone who lived on meat broth, pickles and mayonnaise. And then I realize that I was wrong. I realize this when I wake up one Sunday morning at half past nine, stretch out in my bed for the first time deliberately, and the apartment is as quiet as if there were a fair outside the door. I also realize this when I want to make a cup of tea and there is no clean cup in the cupboard because my daughter’s father’s new boyfriend has brought his three-year-old son. Or I realize that when I am awakened in a damp tent by the call of a hawk and my first sight is of a deserted lake, although I am actually someone who likes to blow-dry his hair and the Internet. The other is there. Whether I like it or not. And he also expresses needs. Camping, for example. After the initial warm welcome, the split grates here and there. The structure wobbles, a gear wheel jams, it groans and it sometimes gets louder than usual. This is not always easy. It may take a while before a drop of oil is found. Sometimes the oil can is hidden. We then search first each for himself, eventually all together. But when it’s on again, it’s on and then sometimes we’re more and sometimes we’re less and actually that’s both quite nice that way. It fluctuates between part-time single parent and extended family. With tidying up, sitting alone on the sofa in the evening as a single person, freedom and loneliness and the joy of now and then all feeling at home together with each other. Sometimes I have to sleep in a tent for that.

Once the brother and his new girlfriend of the new friend of the father of my daughter came to visit, there it became already almost confusing for myself, who should get now actually all a Christmas gift from whom. Not to forget the two mothers of the son of the new boyfriend of the father of my daughter. In any case, family photos are getting wider and wider, and the definition of what we call family is also getting softened edges. If cousins and aunts were added, we would have to stick another photo next to it with scotch tape if necessary.

continue to “Being sick”

Auch interessant

  • Part 34: Berlin

    … was already spring-like and housed us for two months. A daily routine set in. Lots of fresh air and lots of alone time. The other mothers had older children and had mostly returned to their desks. A week to the grandparents. Milla began to slur her words and because she was so fond of…

  • Part 12: Moscow after

    In Berlin one day rest from each other, then another try, right after breakfast. Lie still, feet up. In Berlin, it was less exciting, but somehow also more comfortable. Then back to work. How was your trip? Super! Moscow is really worth seeing, the huge streets, the high houses, this icy cold. Quite an experience….

  • Part 15: Berlin III

    Then another cycle and now it was unlikely. Our two lives made a new life impossible in those four weeks. Never mind, try anyway. And then another full moon and I thought jump, jump, jump and ovulation came but way too late and I was frustrated. And I think Gianni does too. We decided to…

  • Part 36: Fourth Tour

    Italy up and down. In the meantime we were here so often that the view for the small pretty trivialities almost got lost. We lived with and belonged to it and yet not. At least I don’t. I felt the constraints that a daughter-in-law could get into, and yet I remained a guest, because that’s…

  • Part 2: The Bang

    There are things that don’t really exist. And certainly not in your own relationship. And then you hear yourself say: leave the keys and go! First it rustles, then it clangs, and finally your apartment door crashes into the lock. You are left alone in the bathtub in which you were just lying together. What you see is fog. Until you realize that this is really happening right now. And then you start to shiver. That was me, after seven years of a marriage-like relationship.